We, among many others, took a trip to Baltimore’s Pimlico Race Course yesterday for the Virgin Festival, an all-day Lollapalooza-esque outdoor rock show with 14 bands and 5 DJ’s performing on 3 stages. Here I am using an image of a stoned kid who somehow managed to get up off the ground in time to see Gnarls Barkley as an establishing shot for a lengthy diatribe about my day.

Steve and I went with our friends Cara and Devin, and the four of us were faced with a hard day of decision-making. The performance schedules conflicted, such that we would often have to pick one band over another, and we'd often had to split up when our priorities differed.

First we caught the beginning of the Kasabian show on the main stage, but left midway to catch the Drive By Truckers on the second stage. Both of them were OK, nothing that I got too excited about. For those two shows, I was kinda still getting my bearings, and saving my energy for the excitement forthcoming.

My first source of excitement was the New Pornographers' show on the second stage. I adore them, and I had never seen them live before. They may be Canadian, but they are one of my favorite happy-music bands, and I loved getting a chance to sing along with their catchy catchy co-ed vocals. And oh, how I danced.

They also had a lot of fun with the crowd, pointing the camera at us from time to time so we could see ourselves on the jumbotron and goof out like idots, just like folks do at baseball games. I enjoyed it enough that I even bought a T-shirt (this one!), which is something I seldom do.

Neko Case was not there, and I don’t know why (for all I know she left the band – I am so not up on this stuff), but Kathryn Calder was, and she is freaking adorable. She reminds me of my friend Allison (Iowans? Do you concur?)

After the NP’s, Steve and I headed back toward the main stage. We had missed the beginning of the Raconteurs, the first casualty of the event’s unfortunate scheduling conflicts (though one we sort of engineered, as we'll be seeing them in November). Having missed the beginning, we didn’t feel like fighting our way to the front to get a good view, so we held back and got some air, ate some lunch and drank some $8.00 beers that couldn’t be purchased without waiting in line for at least a half-hour.

We did, however, want to be up front for Gnarls Barkley, so we reunited with Cara and Devin and did our best to get close to the main stage.  In case you are unaware, Cee-Lo and Danger Mouse always perform dressed in character, and the characters they had chosen for us were Roman folks in togas. Cee-Lo introduced himself as Magnum.

Their show was great. Not only were the costumes entertaining, they performed with a small string section, which made for a great rich sound.

The folks in the crowd got a little worked up, however. There was a lot of body-surfing going on, which I am in favor of in theory, but the last time I did it (when I was 15) shall remain the last time I did it. One kid who was passing over us wasn’t able to keep his balance and he fell, landing on his head and kicking me in the back of the neck. That hurt (it still does), and the kid was OK, I guess, because he walked off. But it’s dangerous business! The whole thing made me feel old.

After the too-crowded pit experience, we elected to hang back a bit and watch the Killers from a distance. The four of us spread out a blanket and laid back in the sun for a while, enjoying the cool weather and the lack of Airwalk sneakers coming straight at our heads.

After another $8.00 beer and a dinner stop at the Pita Pit, I broke off from the group to head over to the second stage. For you see, the three of them were (rightfully) psyched about seeing The Who, but they were scheduled at the same time as the Scissor Sisters. So I made the tough call to miss out on The Who and to head over to disco-dance-land.

I got to see the better part of the Thievery Corporation show first, though, and it was a great time. Whenever I think of them, I just think of Rob Garza and Eric Hilton up on stage mixing it up, but their live show had some 10 or 12 people up there with them, singing, dancing, and playing instruments I hadn’t ever seen before. I got an unexpected surge of energy, and got my dance on early.

The greatest part about the dance-y crowd at the TC show was that they were a lot more accommodating of folks like me who were trying to squeeze their way to the front. So after some nudging, squeezing, and a bit of luck, I made my way to front-row-center, where I was able to stay so I could get a good view of the Scissor Sisters show.

I feel pretty comfortable saying that their set was my favorite of the day, which is hard, as we saw so much cool stuff. They were just so energetic, and colorful, and they made dirty jokes and dirtier gestures (see image of Ana Matronic straddling Jack Shears below – oh my!) And they played their cover of Comfortably Numb, which is one of my absolute favorite songs ever.

At one point, Ana told the crowd that she loves Baltimore, particularly because of one man – John Waters.  She rattled off a list of his movies that you simply must see (Mondo Trasho, Pink Flamingos, Polyester, etc.), and the thrilling things you’ll learn about if you do so (singing assholes, chicken-fucking, shit-eating, etc.).  I very much appreciated this, as every time I see a sign for Baltimore or find myself heading toward Baltimore, I think of John Waters, and the colorfully trashy tint that he’s given the city for me.  Nice to know I’m not alone.

Anyway, they ruled. They played a few songs from their new album, which shall be released in the next week or so. I'm now very anxious to run out and get it!

After SS, I reunited with the rest of the crew, all of whom were floating on a psyched-up cloud after seeing The Who. The last two concurrent shows of the night were the Red Hot Chili Peppers and the Flaming Lips. The three of them had decided to watch the Flaming Lips, and came over to the second stage. I said hello but quickly jet off again, because I wanted to see at least a little of the RHCP’s. I was a HUGE fan of them back in the early nineties (in fact, I had seen them once before in, oh, 1993). I felt I had to at least check in on them and see how they were doing. I wasn’t too impressed. I’m not so hot about their new album. So I mozied back over to see the Flaming Lips.

I’d seen them once before, too, back in, oh, 1995. At that time, they were just your average alterna-boy-band. But jeepers – who knew that their stage presence had evolved into something so very wacky?? I hear I missed Wayne Coyne getting into a huge inflatable hamster ball and rolling around on op of the crowd. But I did catch the crowd of santas, freaks, superheroes, and folks in alien costumes that joined them on stage. And the progressively huger balloons that they sent off into the crowd. And the confetti guns. I think their music is good, but their showmanship is quite unsurpassed. It was a fun way to end the day.